It is never easy for children or adolescents to live with a chronic condition like diabetes. In boys, we often see different coping mechanisms by both the diabetic teen and the parents than in girls. Interestingly, diabetes in boys is perceived by the parents, especially the mothers. While there are no specific scientific studies on the matter, there have been some anecdotal and non-scientific studies conducted on diabetes in boys and girls and the way they perceive their condition, and the role the parents play in managing the condition. Usually, one parent is identified by the teenager as being the primary “helper” to them with the condition, even in two parent households. And in almost all cases where both parents are living with the child, the mother is identified as the primary caretaker.
How Do the Mothers Perceive Their Child’s Condition?
In an unscientific study done by the Institute of Education at the University of London, it was found that the mothers of girls with diabetes were more likely to perceive their girls as being in control of their diabetes than the mothers of boys. Diabetes in boys was seen as less managed by the boy than diabetes in girls, even though most mothers described their sons as physically fit. The mothers seemed to think the boys were less able to care for themselves than the girls of the same age, even though they were not perceived as being “sicker”. Because of this perception, the mothers seemed to think their sons needed more help from them than did the mothers of girls with diabetes, who are generally perceived as “being in control”.
Why does Diabetes in Boys Need to be Monitored by their Parents’ Closer?
In general, boys seemed to describe diabetes as having a minimal effect on their lives. Diabetes in boys is more often hidden from their friends and from people outside the immediate family. Boys are less likely to give themselves insulin injections at school when needed, and less likely to test themselves outside of the privacy of their homes. And the mothers are often seen as enabling this behavior.
It seems that most boys tend to think that any signs of an illness will make them look weak to their peers. Boys usually do not discuss their diabetes with their teachers or other adults in their lives. So the mothers had to tell their son’s teachers about their condition, for example, so that they wouldn’t get in trouble if found in possession of a needle at school. This type of help is often invisible to the boys themselves, and is probably the reason the mothers think their sons need their help more.
Despite the secrecy, diabetes in boys is generally well managed and their blood sugar is in control. It’s just that they like to think of it as “no big deal” and treat their condition in a rigid way that makes them feel in control. But it is this very perception that also leads some boys to be in denial of their condition and not treat their diabetes correctly. It is crucial that diabetes in boys and girls is monitored by parents and doctors to avoid long-term and irreversible damage. But because boys tend to be more private about their diabetes and the treatment of it, parents should be on the lookout to be sure they are taking care of it properly, taking their medicine as needed, sticking to a good diet, and exercising and testing as required. As they grow into adulthood, they are likely to open up more about it, but the teenage years can be difficult with diabetes, just as so many other things are in this age group.
